So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
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