You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
