Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Randomize
