Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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