Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
