Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
True but thats because hes a fetus.
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
And then my night got REAL pukey
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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