with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
