i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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