Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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