You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
