i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
You're so nebulous sometimes
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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