Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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