That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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