I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
