He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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