he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
NoShamevember. You game?
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
