If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
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