I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Randomize
