She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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