8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
