what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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