Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Randomize