he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
