I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
