Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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