And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
