my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
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