There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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