I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Randomize
