That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
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