super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize