He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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