Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Randomize
