I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
my nose is crying tears of wow.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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