Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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