Who wears a wallet chain?!
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Randomize
