apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
