i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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