Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
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