stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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