I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
