All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize