i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
