Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
