you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I need a burrito and a hug.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
