Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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