that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Randomize
