I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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