i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Randomize