Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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