Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
